I’ve read posts throughout the years written by some of my favorite bloggers making sure their readers understand that their blogs are a mere glimpse into the “pretty” parts of their lives. Ensuring those following that contrary to popular belief, they aren’t always dressed better than Rachel Zoe, eating a meal prepared by Wolfgang Puck himself, while their perfectly clean and behaved (and well dressed) children silently complete a masterpiece to rival the greatest works of art in history.
Not only am I none of those things…like, ever, but I also want to believe that I keep it real enough that you guys know life in my little world is far from an endless perfect and happy fairy tale.
Sitting here tonight, alone, again, on this pleather couch in TLF, watching a crap movie I’m not the least bit interested in because it’s the only thing AFN (Armed Forces Network) has on, not even wondering when Will will finally get “home” for the night because anytime he says he’ll be home in an hour it turns into 2 or 3, I can’t help but think…I seriously hope people realize that the travel and excitement I post about are literally the highlights in the real life, everyday, often very boring reality that we live.
Most importantly, I don’t want a future JAG wife or husband, who is probably scouring the interwebs for any and all information they can find about what life in the JAG really means, to find my blog and be led to think that it’s nothing but exotic trips and amazing experiences.
The real truth is, I spend the vast majority of my time alone (well, now with Aubrey). Even before Will became an ADC. The hours of a JAG can be very long. The hours for Will as an ADC, especially when on a case, can often mean working from sunrise to well past sunset.
Tonight Will made it back to our room in lodging at the decent hour of 18:15, and was able to stay (while working on his computer intermittently) for a whole hour and a half. Just long enough to put Aubrey to bed, and eat the dinner I prepared. Then he left to meet with a witness as I finished cleaning up the dishes and settling onto the couch with a glass of wine. We had one free day over the weekend, and that will be the only real time we will have together this entire trip. But to me, it’s worth the trouble of coming all the way here, just to have that day, to be able to sleep in the same bed at night, and to do whatever it takes so that Aubrey at least sees his face as many days as possible.
This life is far from glamorous. It’s full of highs and lows, great extremes of once-in-a-lifetime moments, contrasting with those of utter loneliness. There is no day-to-day routine for us as a family. There is no “normal.”
I’m not writing this to generate sympathy. Call me masochistic, but in an odd way, I thrive on the ups and downs, and constant craziness. Some days the idea of settling back home seems so appealing, but I know I would miss this.
What I do want, is for anyone reading to know that like anyone else, our life, while great and perfect for us, is still full of imperfect and challenging moments.
I’m going to stop there. Just had a moment of needing to relate on the realness of life. The good…and the not so great.